Meaning?

So many times people say things like, "You look way younger than that," or "You have such beautiful hair; is that a perm growing out, or is it natural curl?" Or they have even asked me, "Do you shave your eyebrows and pencil them in?" And the one that really gets me, "You are not fat, you just need to loose a little weight and then you will look just fine..."

I never really know what to believe, because we humans are very guilty of padding the truth with little white lies so we don't hurt one another's feelings. With the exception of those who really don't care about what others feel, and bluntly say whatever is on his or her mind. (Like the 'Do you shave your eyebrows?' person)

In answer to the above questions or comments, I am not as young, nor as old as I look. I am any age at any given time, that I wish to be within my own heart. Sometimes I'm a 12 year old kid, crashing her mountain bike into a tree and totalling it, other times I'm a battle scarred, old woman, who just lost a close friend to the frenzy of life's darkest hours. We do have hereditary young skin in my family though, so I probably do look physically young for my age.

My hair is a cross between Peter Frampton's look in the seventies, (with a more modern twist,sort of,) and a lion's mane. It is unruly, wavy and incorrigible. Really hopeless -- and I'm incompetent when it comes to trendy up dos.

I DO NOT SHAVE MY BROWS AND PENCIL THEM BACK IN!!! I was five years old before I even realized I had eyebrows like everyone else did, because they were such a light color and so thin. As I'm growing older, they are once again thinning and growing lighter. Now I was a very sharp minded child, always inquisitive, so if who we were as children has any bearing on who we are to be when we are old, I should be a sharp minded, inquisitive old lady with no eyebrows! (Someday, if I live that long...)

I really am not fat, that part is true, but I used to be a size three and a size five, then a seven for most of my adult years. So I consider ANY double digit sizes large on my body. I am a size 8 now, and planning on going one more size down -- just because I can.

My point is, with all of this interminable rambling, that it really doesn't matter what people think of me, or how I truly look. My body's appearance is irrelevant. I am who I am from within the depths of my mind, heart and soul. My life experiences have made me who I am today, not my body. My life experiences will continuously change me and recreate me, and I, for one, am grateful for the meaning those experiences add to my existence. I always look for meaning, for reasons, sometimes too much, I admit, but usually the pursuit of truth and the realization of it, makes it all worthwhile for me in the end...